I’m a pretty confrontational arguer. Frankly, I’m often an ass. But why do I have to be such an ass? Well, I honestly don’t mean to be, but sometimes I just don’t care enough to not be an ass. I try. Sometimes, anyway.
I argue about things because finding the truth is primarily a moral issue for me, and I think it should be for almost anyone else as well. If you respect the autonomy of the individual, and you respect that they have moral responsibilities with their decisions, then you are under moral obligation to argue with them about things that affect their decision if you disagree with them. If they don’t want the argument, I’ll back off. I just can’t make that decision FOR THEM in advance. It’s related to an old SCOTUS saying about free speech: it’s the right to hear other people you disagree with. And that also means that I’m required to listen to people that infuriate me (though mostly, I think it’s cute).
This is what a functioning public square is supposed to look like.
Are you familiar with the term “mansplanation”?
: )
If my privilege is showing, I’m going to need more than that to know why this is relevant
I’m referring to this part of your post:
” you are under moral obligation to argue with them about things that affect their decision if you disagree with them. If they don’t want the argument, I’ll back off. I just can’t make that decision FOR THEM in advance. ”
And I guess I’m doing that to you.
I read a wide variety of blogs in order to inform myself of different POVs. Some of them are self-styled feminist and some are rad-fem, and one thing they hate is to be communicating their POV and have somebody show up and (from their perspective) tell them they are doing it wrong. They absolutely frickin HATE it. I think they would ask you why you think they have not already considered every side of the decision they have before them to their own satisfaction and why you think they need your special wisdom. I rarely comment on those blogs, myself, and tread carefully when I do.
I do understand the desire to express things to people that they may not have thought about – see, I am doing it now, and you may roll your eyes at my (wo)mansplanation if you want.